Friday, April 9, 2010

Regarding Sara

I was looking back through some of my older posts. I have been blogging for quite a while, I guess. When I started, it was so much easier, because my kids were petite and cute. They had chubby cheeks and little bittie teeth. They said adorable things and loved everyone. Now.... they are older. They are not cute very often. More and more, I think, "Help! I'm in over my head!" I miss the days when the most pressing question was, "Baby food from a jar, or make my own?" Parenting is getting complicated, just when I thought it was supposed to get easier. Here are the questions that I must ponder this week regarding Sara, who recently turned 11.

Pressing questions for the mother of an 11 year-old girl.

1. Does this flat-as-the-Kansas-prairies child really need a bra? Actually, the answer is yes, I guess. The pediatrician said she would feel more secure about herself if I let her have one. Those two were in cahoots - I could tell. OK, we went to Target and found the training bra aisle. It took some searching to find ones that weren't padded (No WAY! How can you enhance something that DOES NOT EXIST?), but we managed to get some little vest thingies. By the next day, she was already complaining about straps showing. Welcome to the rest of your life, kid.

2. How much help with a project is too much help? Here's her Oregon "float" for the long-awaited Fifth Grade Parade of States.
I think it turned out pretty well. You've got the covered wagon theme going, and the flat bit up by the handle is the "ocean", complete with fishing boat. Then there's a map suspended from the wagon bows. True, her dad built the wagon bows and figured out how to make the mountain. He showed her how to paint it, but she did the painting and all the rest. Anyway, at our house, parental help is dicey anyway. Notice that the wagon bows are already going catywumpus. That's because we decided to pull it to school this morning using the overland route, which was a little bumpy.
Simon also suggested adding a few of the state's products, and found a bottle of Oregon wine in the rack. We drank it up, and he put the bottle on there. The only other product they bothered with was a piece of wood. C'mon! He just wanted the wine bottle on there to see if he could get a reaction from the school administration over some zero tolerance policy; or at least cause some clucking among the Latter Day Saint teachers and parents. Since he is out of town, I took the wine bottle off the float and threw it out. See Sara? Parents aren't really very helpful after all.
3. What am I supposed to do about the badly behaved girls in her Girl Scout troop? There are three brainless, blathering girls in there that I don't even think realize that they are at a Girl Scout meeting. They spend the whole time yelling and monkeying around. It drives the other girls crazy. The troop can barely get anything done. The leader says it drives her nuts, too, but that, "These are the girls who really need Girl Scouts the most". Hmmm... That's a very nice sentiment. The leader is a better person than I am. I find myself fantasizing about chaperoning a camping trip and scaring them so badly with bear stories that they run away and never come back. Maybe a little scratching at the tent wall in the middle of the night, with some growling and huffing sounds...
4. Am I supposed to be freaking out about middle school already? She has one more year left in elementary school, and then it is time for the dreaded middle school experience. Turns out that, just as she is supposed to start there, the building will be torn down and rebuilt. The kids from her school will be bused to another middle school several miles away, where they will share the building with the kids from that school. Granted, it is a really spacious school, but some parents are already pulling their kids out of our local elementary and putting them in elementary schools that will be served by middle schools unaffected by the disruption. Of course, that means that they can't use the school buses and will have to drop off and pick up their kids every day. I work full-time. And Sara doesn't want to be separated from her friends. If I let her be bused to the other school, am I the Antichrist?
5. Does she need braces? The dentist says so, and referred us his orthodontist buddy. But of course, it might all be a conspiracy. I had braces, but there was no doubt I needed them. My mouth looked like a glacier that was about to calve. How the hell am I supposed to know if she needs braces?
6. And the big one for today. Do I think this haircut looks cute? She loves it. Sure, Sara. I would never dream of telling you that you really...

...look just like your brother! See? Don't you think her teeth look fine? I mean, once those canines come in.

8 comments:

Amrita said...

As the kids grow upMoms grow up too Ha - ha-ha.

Yes the hair cut looks very cute

Lillian said...

On hair: Cute!

On braces: Just do it. This is in the same category as training bras, but more expensive. I.e., it seems ridiculous now but later you realize it was important to do so she can grow into it rather than being embarrassed when it's obvious that she needs it. Braces can be short-lived things for kids who don't need much done, but still make a big visual difference.

On school projects: Wow! As a lazy homeschooling parent I have to say that the mere idea a project of that magnitude is required for school would blow me away. You guys are all awesome to create something like that! I would likely just look baffled and say, "Can't we just study Oregon from a book?"

The World According To Me said...

She looks healthy and cute! Makes me want to be a kid again.

suesun said...

As a new sporter of the short do myself, I think her haircut is awesome! I was just thinking that my son Grant, who has beautiful reddish hair down his back, and who is always mistaken for a girl, should hang out with Sara! They could have such fun out and about messing with people's minds! :)

As for middle school, I am starting my own for next year!! It's always been a dream. I will have about 8 6th graders. I wish you guys were here so Sara could come.

cinnibonbon said...

The braces ? Yes, yes, My girl had them in middle school and cried-- because she's was the only one! NOw? All her high school friends have them and she thanks me for having done it early!!!

Bra? Well have you tried the "cami like' tops instead? My kiddo liked them for a bit until she out grew them. I guess a bra is important to some girls. I CLEARLY recall flushing my first bra down the toilet at school--my mom freaked because I came home without it--she thought something had happened to me!!! hahha

Love the hair cut---perfect for the warm weather!

cinnibonbon said...

Yes--flushed it!!! And it clogged too--I just ran out!!! hehe--such a scaring experience!!!

Hope all is well.

cinnibonbon said...

Happy Mother's Day!!!

xoxox

Maria said...

Kate...you and I are soul sisters in this. I hadn't read your blog for awhile, so decided to catch up. Your post caught me in a melancholy mood (Bing leaves tomorrow for Japan and then on to Africa...she won a Fulbright! and Liv leaves on Friday to spend the summer with her father) and I nearly cried when reading this. FINALLY. A mother of an eleven year old girl (actually Liv won't be 11 until July) who sounds like me.

1) I can't even imagine Liv wanting a bra. God..is it COMING? Fuck.

2) Liv had braces two years ago. So far, things seem to be okay. The orthodontist told me that she may need them again in a year or so if her teeth resettle back.

3) Where the hell is my baby? The one whom I called "Patrinka" and who loved my lap. Holding her now is like trying to hold an arm full of wire hangers.

4) Every freakin' parent I meet at school is buzzing about where their kids will go to junior high. Liv's last year of Montessori is next year and then? My choices are a prestigious, pricey, our-shit-doesn't-stink private school that is two blocks away from us and will cost us a fortune, Catholic school, or public school. The school she attends now is a very progressive (no desks), very green, very liberal school. I can't imagine how she would fare in public school after this. I am leery of Catholic school (does it make me a hypocrite that I have huge problems with the Catholic faith but am considering sending my daughter into their nest?) That leaves the private school. Oh dear. And why must I think about this NOW? Why is everyone bugging me about this??

So, yes...I hear you, sister.

And I am SO glad that your tests came back clean. My little sister (she is actually 43) just had her 5th clean test and my family is celebrating by a huge get-together over Memorial Day weekend. Of course, Jessie has already called me to say, "You know Mom made her 5th year too and then five months later, it came back." She feels superstitious about celebrating. But, truly? I am just so thrilled to have her here with us. And I have this feeling that she will be here for a long, long time.

I think you will too.

Thanks for your blog. I'd forgotten how much I enjoy reading it.