Snarky Bitch!

That's me, I'm afraid.

I'm hoping it's just a temporary attitude quirk, easily adjusted by Jack Daniels, a hot shower or a long jog; but...I was contemplating the high and low points of my day today when I sensed a pattern emerging: the things which gave me pleasure and irked me did so because I am... [whisper this, with venom] not very nice.

High Point:

We had our monthly all-school staff meeting this afternoon, and during the meeting a "good-bye" card was circulating for H., the evil sadist who walked out and left the rest of our department scrambling, confused and exhausted. Alas, there was some confusion because there are two people on the staff with that first name. Suddenly, near the end of the meeting, one of the teachers gasped and started laughing, when the teacher next to her snorted, "Anybody got some white-out?" Several of the staff thought it was the OTHER H. who was leaving. The other H. is our head bus-driver; people had been writing comments like,"We knew we could count on you in any weather!" "Thanks so much picking up our kids for so many years!" I creased up laughing.

Low Point:

My daughter sings in her elementary school chorus, and they were invited to put on a concert at the state capitol building today. It has just re-opened after extensive renovations, so there are open-houses and receptions which allow the people to see how their $20,000,000 was spent. The windows are definitely cleaner. My office is only a few minute's drive from the Capitol, so I took a break and drove over there to hear her. This would have been great if not for the presence of the other mothers. I should start referring to them as the Othermothers, since I really do lump them together and stereotype them to that extent. School activities at which I have to hang with the Othermothers depress me, because I spend the whole time wondering how I measure up. By and large, the moms who can attend their children's functions in the middle of the day are the ones who don't work outside the home. They have time to volunteer at the school, serve on the PTA, etc... They all seem to know each other. Our part of town isn't the most affluent part of Salt Lake, but it's affluent enough to make me wonder how I ended up there. I keep thinking that I should have stayed in the mountains, where I was happy and semi-feral. I am intimidated by the Othermothers. One of them was standing by me and, all through the concert, I found my attention wandering to her. Hmmm...Taller. Slimmer. Perfect hair. Makeup. Cute furry vest. High end camera (I forgot mine at the office). AND, when the concert had finished, she turned to me and asked, "So, which one is yours?" I pointed out Sara, and she pointed out her daughter. I thought, "All that, and she's nicer than I am, too."

So, those were my (less-than-flattering-but-entirely-truthful) high and low points for today. How about you? I like to collect the high and low points of other people. Can you think of the single best moment of your day today? Single worst moment?