Let's Talk About Something Else

So, when I tell my friends that I'm overwhelmed because Si is laid up, and that I can't get all the stuff done that needs doing, they probably wonder why I then spend time baking bread, of all things. I don't know why. I never got high marks for "spends time wisely".

This is how to make"Walnut Boule".

It is a yeast-rising bread, the ultimate time waster. Soooo..... pour one cup of warm water into a large bowl and in it, dissolve 3 Tbsp. of sugar and a package of yeast. Let it stand for 5 minutes.

See that the yeast is doing its yeasty thing and feel relieved. I have killed my share of yeast.

OK, so this is a special moment dedicated to my blog-panion, Dive. When we have "Cooking with Dive" (the snob), we are encouraged to use only the best of everything. Dive always gets the freshest ingredients: the wild salmon; the heirloom miso. Of course, Dive has access to something I don't: London. OK, Dive - this walnut oil was bought with you in mind. I pulled this $15 sucker off the grocer's shelf and thought of you. Stir 1 Tbsp. of this fancy-ass walnut oil into the yeast mixture. Wonder what you will do with all the rest of it and tell yourself you had better think of something. Add about 2 cups of bread flour and 1 cup of whole wheat flour to the yeasty oily mixture. Put in 1.5 tsp of salt, too. Stir until it looks like...

...this.

Turn it out onto a floured surface and...

...start kneading. Go crazy with the kneading for about 5 minutes. This should provide ample opportunity to work through any anxiety, concern or sex-deprived feelings brought on by depressed spouses with knee injuries. The dough should feel smooth and elastic. If it sticks to your hands, add a little more flour.

Take a clean, large bowl and spray some Pam into it. Plop the dough in and flip it over, so that the Pam has coated it all over. This will prevent drying and cracking. Cover it with a dish towel and let it rise in a warm place (the turned-off oven, for example). Wonder if the food blobs in the bottom of the oven will show at this camera angle. Close the oven and go away for an hour.

Stop. Don't go. Come back, because you need to toast some walnuts before you can leave. Toast .5 of a cup of chopped walnuts. Do this sooner, not later. If you are dumb like me and you wait until the hour is almost up before toasting the walnuts you will regret it. When the hour is up, the dough should be almost twice as big as it was originally. Punch it down and knead the walnuts into it. If they have just finished toasting, this will feel a little like kneading hot buckshot into the loaf, so I hope you took my advice.

Shape the dough into a 9-inch round, and put it on a cookie sheet with a scattering of cornmeal. Worry that it is perhaps too small and has not been rising sufficiently. Cover it up again and put it back in its warm place for another hour.

OK, that is definitely doubled in size. I guess I'll stop worrying.

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Combine 1 tbsp of milk and 1 egg white in a little dish and brush it over the top of the loaf. Cut a crosshatch on the top of the loaf with a sharp knife. bake for 30 minutes.

There! What a sense of accomplishment, right! No! Because the laundry still isn't done and the lawn it still (STILL!!) not mowed and Sara has a plantar wart and you need to make a gyno appointment and the peaches are falling off the tree...

But...bread is bread.