Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Perfect Panties

I FINALLY went to see Dr. Perfect today. His nurse pulled the adhesive tape off and I almost had an orgasm. I was so blissed out that I barely noticed when he started pulling stitches. Now I can shower! In fact, this will be a very quick blog entry so I can go do that very thing. The bummer is that I have to wear an underwire bra day and night for 6 weeks. The doctor was very sweet to tell me that I can take it off to bathe. He was in a rare mood, in fact. Complimented my boots, and told me that I was one of his favorite patients. His latte must have been extra foamy today or something.

He checked on my bruised bootie as well and snorted when he saw it, "It DOES look like Panama!" This was an issue for me this morning. My relationship with Doctor Perfect has up to now been all above the waist. It has been almost a year, now, and I realized that we haven't managed to get past second base. I woke to the realization that he was going to need to check out my less familiar half, and I had a hard time choosing the right underpants. A thong would definitely send the wrong message. Thong = wrong. On the other hand, one doesn't want to wear granny panties in this situation,wither. Something middle of the road. And without holes.

Gotta go take a hot shower! Shower! Shower! Gonna wash the purple marker spelling out "No BP, No IV" off my left arm. Gonna shave my pits. Gonna scrub all the black adhesive marks away! Bye!

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