Some Things Never Change

So, recent family crises have brought about an unprecedented amount of communication with my mother and older siblings. Normally, we are not great at keeping in touch. I probably spent 45 minutes on the phone with my sister this afternoon. It is the longest conversation we have had in 5 years, easily. Not that we don't get along-we just never talk. Which may explain our relative harmony... It may seem strange to other people, but it seems to work for us.


I must tell you that my older brother and sister are a lot older than me; like seven and nine years older. It makes me laugh how we pick up where we left off. My older brother and I were on the phone a week or so ago:

Kate: I feel bad that I'm not there. You guys have told Dad that I'll be there as soon as I can, right? He doesn't think I don't care about him, right? All the rest of you have been able to see him and...

Charles: [after a short pause, in the high-pitched, breathy voice that he has used for taunting his siblings ALL HIS LIFE, which I have probably not heard for 15 years or so...] Oh, I'm sure he's noticed. All of the other children have been to see him. His older son and daughter...even his younger son has been at his bedside. But WHERE is his younger daughter? He-

Kate: (laughing) All right, all right! Enough!

I felt like saying, "It's so cute when you torment me like you did when I was a kid!"

Then today, convoluted discussions with my older sister about getting the house packed up and helping Mom move. It's difficult in a town as small as Markesan. There is no bulk trash pickup - it all has to be taken to a landfill some distance away. The estate sale people don't want to come and get our stuff. Too far off the beaten track. They WILL allow us to add our stuff to another estate sale in a larger town, if we bring it there ourselves. Can we coordinate a moving van to move Mom to her condo and the sale items to the estate sale on the same day? Kill two birds with one stone? Save $500? It has to be done on a certain day, as determined by the estate sale people.

This needs to be passed by Mom, then it has to be passed by my brother. What if that day doesn't work for him? I'm thinking, big deal. I'll be there. If he needs to work that day, it'll be all right. I can handle it, and if I need help, I will go to the minister at Mom's church and have him give me some phone numbers of people I can wrangle to help out. Like I said, it's a small town. My sister days she can't walk down the street without each persoin asking her how Dad is, and if there is anything they can do to help. I'm really good at mobilizing troops - I do it every day at work.

That's the funny thing to me. I am She Who Must Be Obeyed! Queen of the Pushy Broads. To all of us women who go through life with our hands on our hips, I guess there is a universal truth. The only people in the world who might fail to see us this way would be our older siblings. To mine, I will always be a pants-wetter who breaks their stuff. I have to admit that I find that comforting.