Saturday, April 12, 2008

Survey

Simon was out in Vail one evening this past week, walking down the street, when a woman strode purposefully up to him, her husband trailing along behind. She was pretty drunk, which explains some things.

"I'm taking a survey about oral sex."
"I beg your pardon?" [with a British accent]
"I'm taking a survey! About oral sex."
"I notice you don't have a clip board. Am I a sample of one?"
"Huh? Never mind. How often do you have oral sex?"
"Which kind?"
"What!?"
"Which kind? The kind I get or the kind I give?"

By this time, her husband had ambled up.

"You know..." She rolled her eyes at her spouse in disgust. "The kind HE wants."
"OH! You mean blow jobs. In my marriage, it's blow jobs on demand, of course!" [I shoot him a jaundiced look at this point in the narrative.] Exasperated, she stomped off into another bar. Her husband smiled gratefully at Simon, gave him a thumbs up and followed her.

12 comments:

Lillian said...

Bwahahahahaha!

dive said...

Blow jobs send me to sleep.
I had a girlfriend once who really liked to give 'em and she got so exasperated. I just relax like a cat and doze off.
I know I'm weird but hey ho.

Anonymous said...

ha ha ha.... interesting on-the-spot survey....

Amrita said...

Oh dear! Tsk...tsk

Can people really say such things

Rebecca said...

Oh my God!! That was hilarious. Guess she wasn't in the mood to give her man a blow job! but I can't imagine walking up to a stranger for affirmation on THAT topic!

Anonymous said...

When does the next flight to Vail leave???


Anonymously, John

Kate said...

Amrita-
Well, they shouldn't, but they do! At least asking total strangers about their sex lives is still considered shocking enough to merit a blog entry. :)

Kate said...

Dive-
To sleep? Boy, that would bruise my ego...

Kate said...

John-
Dust off your one-liners: she may still be there!

The World According To Me said...

Naughty but funny!

cinnibonbon said...

LOL..You're killing me..I love it!!

Anonymous said...

Oral fixations, aside....

I want to take this opportunity to wish Kate well on her first marathon run this Saturday.

You go, girl!!!
:)))


Anonymously, John